Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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