My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Bring me that man meat
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
