I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
