My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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