Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I don't think brook has ever known best
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Randomize
