the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
