I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You may now shotgun with the bride
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
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