I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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