Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
