I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize