im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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