Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
