I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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