Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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