margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
