ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
He literally asked permission to hit on me
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
