got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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