the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
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