Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize