It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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