Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
