does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
