I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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