omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
