Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
