I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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