ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
