If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
