So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
