is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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