yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
