now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
