She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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