Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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