Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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