I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
