You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
