we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize