im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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