so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
