you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
