If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
