why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
