i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Randomize