I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
No subtext here. People are naked.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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