You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
