You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Are we still banned from the library?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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