Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
