I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
