i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize